Establishing a Healthy Family Culture | Safety and Love in Family Relationships
What is more important in life than establishing a healthy family culture… one where you and your kids are teammates in the process of helping them grow and develop and you share in the responsibilities of the home environment? I’m going to share exactly how you can establish a healthy family culture.
Be sure to click below to if you’d love to learn how to get your kids to listen without raising your voice or nagging.
Establishing a healthy family culture is a great goal to have for any parent wanting to build a positive happy life with their kids. You need to be able to build on some basic ideals. These are the ideals that I consider important in establishing that healthy family culture you want and deserve.
Start From a Place of Safety and Love
Always Start from a place of safety and love, first and foremost. Nothing can be achieved in any relationship when there isn’t a feeling of safety and love. Your child rearing, and even discipline, are important, but nothing is more important than this. Make sure that no matter what you do with your kids, you start from love and keep them feeling safe.
Build Your Family Up
2nd, Aways Build, never destroy: Punishing behavior is a process of destroying. You are tearing down behavior you don’t want to see. It is hard, involved and it can mess with the foundation if you’re not careful. It’s always better to find ways to build new skills and behavior you want to see instead. Always be in the process of building a strong and flexible relationship and try not to spend too much time tearing things down.
Start with Small Expectations and Build Over Time
3rd, Start small and build over time. Find ways to be successful in whatever it is you are trying to do. Most often that means, lower expectations at first, find manageable targets that are likely to be achieved and then slowly start to build back your expectations over time and only from continued success.
Communicate – Talk, Don’t Yell
4th, Learn to talk instead of yell. Simple to say, harder to do. Parenting happens fast and it never stops. You are always dealing with one thing or another and more likely 10 things at a time. It is easy to get emotional and lose your temper with your kids.
Remember, nothing done in anger or harshness ever takes less time than something done under control. Talk instead of yelling, and if you feel the need to yell, take a second and figure out what you are not doing that is causing your child to put you in the position of feeling like you want to yell. Then find a way to talk that out.
Let the Consequences Do the Talking
5th, Let consequences both positive and negative do the talking. Whether you are wanting to reinforce a behavior you would love to see more of or trying to correct one you would not want to see again, try to let the consequences, or the actual changes in the environment after the behavior show your child what behavior works for them and what doesn’t.
The more you can let the consequences or post behavior environment do the talking for you, the less you will find a need to try to push them through with your sheer will and personality which will have its limits and is likely to fail you when you need it most.
Ask for Help
6th, Ask for help when you need it. Get help from family and friends. Don’t try to do everything alone. Teach yourself and your children that life is better with community and that everyone needs help sometimes. And don’t be afraid to ask your kids for help as well. They will appreciate that they can be there for you and that you trust them to help out. And it will teach them to ask for help when they need it as well.
Offer to Help Your Kids, but Don’t Force It
And finally, always offer help to your kids whenever you think it is needed but don’t force it on them. Let them know you are always there for them but that you respect their privacy and boundaries as well. If you micromanage them when they don’t want or need it, they won’t look to you for help when they do.
Want more helpful tips and ideas on how to build better relationships with your kids while getting them to do the things you need them to do, click here to check out the free video. It is immediately available for you there and filled with just under an hour of valuable help and info.
Again, if your goal is to establish a healthy family culture, there is a lot that you will need to do and you have to learn to be consistent in doing it, but for now, just start with these:
7 Tips for Establishing a Healthy Family Culture
- Always Start from a place of safety and love, first and foremost.
- Always look to Build, not destroy
- Start Small and build over time from success.
- Learn to talk instead of yell.
- Let both positive and negative consequences do the talking for you.
- Ask for help when you need it….
And the 7th tip for helping you establish a healthy family culture…offer your kids help when you think they need it but never try to force it on them.
Don’t forget to check out the free workshop here called How to Get Your Kids to Listen Without Raising Your Voice or Nagging and it is free for you. Take advantage of the free help and guidance.